Posted on 7 March 2018

From what I understand of the comics, adult Peter Parker’s biggest problems (aside from having to fight crime) are:

• Keeping his identity secret
• Making money

His solution is to get exclusive photos of himself, as Spider-Man, and sell them to J. Jonah Jameson.

The problem with this, as I recall, is it establishes that he has links to Spider-Man, at times putting himself and his loved ones in as almost as much danger as simply publicly admitting he is Spider-Man.

I propose the better solution would be to reinvent Peter Parker as a skilled cosplayer and enter the same appearance circuit as people who have similar body types to Barack Obama and Kim Jong-Un. A few best costume prizes would certainly make some dough, plus you now have a credible reason for traveling with a Spider-Man costume.

Similarly, let’s say a group of wizards wanted to travel through the world of non-wizards more comfortably without arousing suspicion.

A good way to do that might be to write a best-selling book series that spawns a movie, game and merchandising franchise and a dedicated fandom longing to dress, speak and act as wizards. You could start selling wizard candy in human stores and have credible reasons for traveling in large numbers to places where you dress in wizard-style clothes and engage in wizard-like activity.

Heck, make a movie popular enough and you could even start openly identifying as being part of an alien religion on census forms.

Filed under: misc