#Orlando

One year I worked in a temporary sales shop- it was a brief set-up that only lasted maybe six months, total.
At the end of it, one of my co-workers stood up to say goodbye to the group and broke down in tears.
He was gay and, he said, this was the first time he’d ever been in an environment where it wasn’t a source of stress for him.

Frigging mid-twenties and it was his first time being with a group of people who allowed him to be who he was without feeling othered by it.
It was then I realized I would never, ever understand the immense bravery and resilience it would take to simply exist as a gay man in the world (and by extension any non-cisgendered person, though at that point I wasn’t aware enough to understand the full spectrum).
That sense- of knowing this is a terrible thing while also knowing I will never fully understand just how terrible and deeply personal it is- that’s how i feel today.
If you are being affected by today’s events on a deeper level than I am- if this cuts deeper to who you are than it possibly can for me- I’m sorry. I can never fully feel what you feel, but just know – I am here, if there is anything I can do.